The First Time...

As signs go, I think I missed a couple last week.  Looking back I probably would have known the weekend wasn't going to go as planned.  I had a busy week last week, David's birthday, a Tedy's Team meeting, making breakfast and baking cakes for Easter, as well as the daily grind list. I knew it was going to be a long one but had exciting plans to look forward to. No big deal,right?  This is how it went...

Wednesday's Plan: David's favorite dinner and Oreo cake bites for dessert.  Actual: I burnt two batches of white chocolate, which was all I had. The Oreo bites get dipped in white chocolate to make them even more delicious, needless to say they are still in my freezer waiting to get dipped.  Oreo bites out, cupcakes in.  I baked vanilla cupcakes with vanilla frosting.  This is where my planning gets a bit crazy. I knew I was going to be baking (the cupcakes were originally going to be for Easter)  this week so I put all the dry ingredients into ziplock bags that way all I had to do was add wet.  Great idea right?!?! No, because for the cupcake batter I had to cream the butter and sugar together first.  I had the sugar in the bag with the flour meaning I had to start from scratch anyway. Bottom line I made the cupcakes and they were tasty. David's favorite dinner will have to wait until another night.

Thursday's Plan: Go see my nephew Joey play baseball in Amherst Actual: We went to Amherst to see Joey!  Thank goodness I knew enough to pack pjs for the kids because Liam had a blowout like no other and he was in his pjs by 3pm.  It was a beautiful day so LAL and I got to run around, roll and read books in the grass while we watched Joey play.  The game was good  unfortunately we didn't win but we did get to have dinner with Joe which was so nice!  We don't get to see him often because he's in school in Philly and is busy year round with baseball.  The last time we had seen him was last summer and the munchkins were still babies.  Needless to say,  Liam has a new best friend!  I still haven't stopped hearing about Joey!!

Friday's Plan: Have dinner with David's cousins and their families.  Actual: We went to see Eric and Sue and their son Cole who are in town from Kelowna, British Columbia.  They were making homemade pizza..delicious!!  The kids were playing having a good time then all of a sudden Liam starts to throw up. Thank goodness David was in front of him because he had cat like quickness  and caught it all in his hands.  Someone came over with a bowl because next Audrey started.  They didn't stop.  David slept with Liam in our bed and I slept with Audrey in the guest room.  My poor babies were on the same vomit schedule.  Pretty much every hour until about 3am.

Saturday's Plan: Train in the AM for me, then dinner at night to celebrate David's birthday with friends and family Actual:  I trained in the morning with Tedy' Team, that was sad because it was our last training run. Saturday during the day I started baking my Easter cakes.  Then it was time to go to dinner. Maggie came to watch the kids and we went on our way.  We had a great night. There were lots of laughs, great cocktails and great food!  We went to Masa in the South End, highly recommended.  We came home and then it started, David got the bug! He was up all night vomiting, round two!!

Chocolate Cake with Vanilla Frosting and Chocolate Ganache

Paula Deen's Coconut Cake

These are macaroon like treats made with the leftover frosting and  coconut

Sunday's Plan: Easter!  Breakfast with Papa and Del (my father-in -law and his wife) then dinner at Grammy and Boat's home (my mother-in-law and her husband)  Actual: When LAL came down stairs, the look on their faces were priceless.  They saw the Easter baskets could not contain their excitement, they weren't sure if they were allowed to touch them or not.  I told them to have it and they went to town.  Sadly, David was still out of commission so he missed.  I had my camera around my neck but forgot to take pictures.  Papa and Del came for breakfast, I made a delicious overnight french toast casserole.  We ate, opened more Easter gifts, and played for a bit.  The munchkins went down for a long nap. Yahoo, I love when that happens!!  Then it was time to go to Grammy's with dessert in hand.  I put everything I the car before the kids woke up so we could leave right away. Well, as right away as I can with three two year olds.  We got the car and started our drive to Grammy's, and then it happened...Liam threw up...again. Back home we go!  I dropped Liam off with  David, took the car seat out and the girls and I dropped the cakes off.  We hung out for a moment but went back home to check on the guys.  When I walked through the door Liam was sitting on David and they were sharing a spit up bowl.  As gross as this may sound it was also very sweet. I gave the kids dinner and a bath then put them to bed.  I was exhausted!!

I have to openly and honestly admit, Sunday evening was the first time since LAL were born I didn't know if I could do it anymore.  I was broken down.  I couldn't get passed the thought of having to clean a gross and smelly car seat. Or having to wash another set of sheets.  I was over it!!  This weekend was the hardest "mom" weekend for me. Luckily there were some really good times sprinkled in with it but none the less, it was a tough one.  I usually get through my days by telling myself, "this day only happens once."  Meaning, I can't get it back and if I were to spend my days wishing them away there will undoubtedly come a day when I   wish I could have them back.  Already my kids are growing very quickly, one of the most important things to me is to appreciate everyday I have with them. Really, we did work ridiculously hard to bring them into this world, I don't want to take them for granted.

This weekend turned a light on for me.  Everyone has their limits, but its what I do when you get to that point that matters.  I guess the options are to shut down or push through to the next level.  I chose to push through, it was not easy but I did it. I'm hoping it will increase my threshold a little bit higher.  I am regularly stopped by people simply because I have triplets and they have something to say.  Sometimes its a blessing, sometimes its  because they are in awe of me and sometimes its negative.  I usually don't focus on negative but I am for a moment.  When somebody says to me, "Oh, I feel bad for you" or "Oh my gosh three? You must be going crazy?" or "I was pulling my hair out with one and you have three, you poor thing."  I usually smile, walk away and call them a mean name in  head.  This weekend made me think maybe those people shut down more often than they pushed through, that's why they are negative when it comes to the thought of raising children.  Part of me feels bad for them, that maybe nobody told them its ok to feel overwhelmed but the key is to not be defined by it.  The bottom line is, I can only do what I can and I choose to make the best of every moment and recognize when times are rough it won't last forever.