I've heard it many times, "life is a marathon not a sprint." I didn't fully understand that saying until after running my first marathon.
Throughout my training, my coach would tell us, "on any given run you will have your ups and downs, some runs you'll feel great all the way through, some runs you might only feel good for the first mile, and other runs you will have a mixture of both." This mental nugget was helpful for me, in a couple of ways. First, it made me realize I'm not the only one who has great runs and not so great runs sometimes, I'm not alone. Second, I realized that if I can run through a bad patch undoubtedly I will eventually get through to the other side of it.
While I was training to run the Boston Marathon for Tedy's Team and the American Stroke Association, I met my dear friend Melissa. We ran our first training run together (that's when we met), it was supposed to be six miles but we went the scenic seven and a half. Any training run after that through to the marathon finish line we were side by side, chatting, listening, laughing, singing, cursing or just running. It wasn't just Melissa and I though, she and I have the fortune to run the same pace, but there's Nate, together we make up the "Boston Three Party." And to top it off there was, Angela, Jackie, Jenn, Jenn, Johnnie, Matty, Melinda, Nick and Page that was the Saturday crew. We shared the experience together, the joy, the pain, and heartbreak hill (numerous times)! My point is, we did it together. It doesn't matter that we all ran difference paces, we all had a common goal and were cheerleaders for each other.
Throughout the five hours eighteen minutes and seven seconds that it took me to run the marathon I ran the gamut of emotions. It was like being on a roller coaster that I was powering. Sounds fun right?! When I look back on it it was and I'll do it again. There are some of things that really stick out for me on Marathon Monday. It was hot. The water stops on the left side of the road were way less crowded. For whatever reason, mile 11 is where I remember everything that went wrong did but I could be totally wrong. At mile 11, Melissa's iPod stopped working so I turned my music off (we always ran with one ear in) , my hip flexor issue kicked in and my blister started. I think I hate mile 11. When we got to mile 16 it was familiar territory, Woodland, the T-stop in Newton where heartbreak hill commences, that was a boost! I liked knowing where we were and it meant only four more miles until we saw our coach, John. After seeing John which was awesome, only one more mile until we reached our families!! I had a great surprise right before we hit our families, my best friend greeted me with hugs and kisses and waved me on to where David, my mom, her husband, my sister in law, niece and nephew and Melissa's family were. It was just what the doctor ordered!! I needed that! I never thought of quitting but I was dreading continuing, I wanted it to be over. The high from seeing them lasted about three miles for me. The last two miles were grueling. Boylston Street has never felt so long in my life. The team photographer told us plenty of times "look up when you get to the Lenox," I knew if we got to the Lenox we were getting to the finish. Obviously, we did and it was one of the greatest feelings of accomplishment. Almost as great as delivering my babies!
This is what I feel we need in life, people to go through it with, our friends, our family. The people that will pick you up when you fall, cheer you on through your own personal heartbreak hills, know your flaws and still love you, the people that let you know you're not alone. I am blessed with wonderful people in my life. Life is a marathon, there will be ups and downs and I believe the downs make me appreciate the ups. Sometimes it's grueling and painful but what's happiness having never known pain. There's a high that comes with hard work, I like that high. Now the question is, what's next?
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
The First Time...
As signs go, I think I missed a couple last week. Looking back I probably would have known the weekend wasn't going to go as planned. I had a busy week last week, David's birthday, a Tedy's Team meeting, making breakfast and baking cakes for Easter, as well as the daily grind list. I knew it was going to be a long one but had exciting plans to look forward to. No big deal,right? This is how it went...
Wednesday's Plan: David's favorite dinner and Oreo cake bites for dessert. Actual: I burnt two batches of white chocolate, which was all I had. The Oreo bites get dipped in white chocolate to make them even more delicious, needless to say they are still in my freezer waiting to get dipped. Oreo bites out, cupcakes in. I baked vanilla cupcakes with vanilla frosting. This is where my planning gets a bit crazy. I knew I was going to be baking (the cupcakes were originally going to be for Easter) this week so I put all the dry ingredients into ziplock bags that way all I had to do was add wet. Great idea right?!?! No, because for the cupcake batter I had to cream the butter and sugar together first. I had the sugar in the bag with the flour meaning I had to start from scratch anyway. Bottom line I made the cupcakes and they were tasty. David's favorite dinner will have to wait until another night.
Thursday's Plan: Go see my nephew Joey play baseball in Amherst Actual: We went to Amherst to see Joey! Thank goodness I knew enough to pack pjs for the kids because Liam had a blowout like no other and he was in his pjs by 3pm. It was a beautiful day so LAL and I got to run around, roll and read books in the grass while we watched Joey play. The game was good unfortunately we didn't win but we did get to have dinner with Joe which was so nice! We don't get to see him often because he's in school in Philly and is busy year round with baseball. The last time we had seen him was last summer and the munchkins were still babies. Needless to say, Liam has a new best friend! I still haven't stopped hearing about Joey!!
Friday's Plan: Have dinner with David's cousins and their families. Actual: We went to see Eric and Sue and their son Cole who are in town from Kelowna, British Columbia. They were making homemade pizza..delicious!! The kids were playing having a good time then all of a sudden Liam starts to throw up. Thank goodness David was in front of him because he had cat like quickness and caught it all in his hands. Someone came over with a bowl because next Audrey started. They didn't stop. David slept with Liam in our bed and I slept with Audrey in the guest room. My poor babies were on the same vomit schedule. Pretty much every hour until about 3am.
Saturday's Plan: Train in the AM for me, then dinner at night to celebrate David's birthday with friends and family Actual: I trained in the morning with Tedy' Team, that was sad because it was our last training run. Saturday during the day I started baking my Easter cakes. Then it was time to go to dinner. Maggie came to watch the kids and we went on our way. We had a great night. There were lots of laughs, great cocktails and great food! We went to Masa in the South End, highly recommended. We came home and then it started, David got the bug! He was up all night vomiting, round two!!
Sunday's Plan: Easter! Breakfast with Papa and Del (my father-in -law and his wife) then dinner at Grammy and Boat's home (my mother-in-law and her husband) Actual: When LAL came down stairs, the look on their faces were priceless. They saw the Easter baskets could not contain their excitement, they weren't sure if they were allowed to touch them or not. I told them to have it and they went to town. Sadly, David was still out of commission so he missed. I had my camera around my neck but forgot to take pictures. Papa and Del came for breakfast, I made a delicious overnight french toast casserole. We ate, opened more Easter gifts, and played for a bit. The munchkins went down for a long nap. Yahoo, I love when that happens!! Then it was time to go to Grammy's with dessert in hand. I put everything I the car before the kids woke up so we could leave right away. Well, as right away as I can with three two year olds. We got the car and started our drive to Grammy's, and then it happened...Liam threw up...again. Back home we go! I dropped Liam off with David, took the car seat out and the girls and I dropped the cakes off. We hung out for a moment but went back home to check on the guys. When I walked through the door Liam was sitting on David and they were sharing a spit up bowl. As gross as this may sound it was also very sweet. I gave the kids dinner and a bath then put them to bed. I was exhausted!!
I have to openly and honestly admit, Sunday evening was the first time since LAL were born I didn't know if I could do it anymore. I was broken down. I couldn't get passed the thought of having to clean a gross and smelly car seat. Or having to wash another set of sheets. I was over it!! This weekend was the hardest "mom" weekend for me. Luckily there were some really good times sprinkled in with it but none the less, it was a tough one. I usually get through my days by telling myself, "this day only happens once." Meaning, I can't get it back and if I were to spend my days wishing them away there will undoubtedly come a day when I wish I could have them back. Already my kids are growing very quickly, one of the most important things to me is to appreciate everyday I have with them. Really, we did work ridiculously hard to bring them into this world, I don't want to take them for granted.
This weekend turned a light on for me. Everyone has their limits, but its what I do when you get to that point that matters. I guess the options are to shut down or push through to the next level. I chose to push through, it was not easy but I did it. I'm hoping it will increase my threshold a little bit higher. I am regularly stopped by people simply because I have triplets and they have something to say. Sometimes its a blessing, sometimes its because they are in awe of me and sometimes its negative. I usually don't focus on negative but I am for a moment. When somebody says to me, "Oh, I feel bad for you" or "Oh my gosh three? You must be going crazy?" or "I was pulling my hair out with one and you have three, you poor thing." I usually smile, walk away and call them a mean name in head. This weekend made me think maybe those people shut down more often than they pushed through, that's why they are negative when it comes to the thought of raising children. Part of me feels bad for them, that maybe nobody told them its ok to feel overwhelmed but the key is to not be defined by it. The bottom line is, I can only do what I can and I choose to make the best of every moment and recognize when times are rough it won't last forever.
Wednesday's Plan: David's favorite dinner and Oreo cake bites for dessert. Actual: I burnt two batches of white chocolate, which was all I had. The Oreo bites get dipped in white chocolate to make them even more delicious, needless to say they are still in my freezer waiting to get dipped. Oreo bites out, cupcakes in. I baked vanilla cupcakes with vanilla frosting. This is where my planning gets a bit crazy. I knew I was going to be baking (the cupcakes were originally going to be for Easter) this week so I put all the dry ingredients into ziplock bags that way all I had to do was add wet. Great idea right?!?! No, because for the cupcake batter I had to cream the butter and sugar together first. I had the sugar in the bag with the flour meaning I had to start from scratch anyway. Bottom line I made the cupcakes and they were tasty. David's favorite dinner will have to wait until another night.
Friday's Plan: Have dinner with David's cousins and their families. Actual: We went to see Eric and Sue and their son Cole who are in town from Kelowna, British Columbia. They were making homemade pizza..delicious!! The kids were playing having a good time then all of a sudden Liam starts to throw up. Thank goodness David was in front of him because he had cat like quickness and caught it all in his hands. Someone came over with a bowl because next Audrey started. They didn't stop. David slept with Liam in our bed and I slept with Audrey in the guest room. My poor babies were on the same vomit schedule. Pretty much every hour until about 3am.
Saturday's Plan: Train in the AM for me, then dinner at night to celebrate David's birthday with friends and family Actual: I trained in the morning with Tedy' Team, that was sad because it was our last training run. Saturday during the day I started baking my Easter cakes. Then it was time to go to dinner. Maggie came to watch the kids and we went on our way. We had a great night. There were lots of laughs, great cocktails and great food! We went to Masa in the South End, highly recommended. We came home and then it started, David got the bug! He was up all night vomiting, round two!!
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| Chocolate Cake with Vanilla Frosting and Chocolate Ganache |
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| Paula Deen's Coconut Cake |
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| These are macaroon like treats made with the leftover frosting and coconut |
I have to openly and honestly admit, Sunday evening was the first time since LAL were born I didn't know if I could do it anymore. I was broken down. I couldn't get passed the thought of having to clean a gross and smelly car seat. Or having to wash another set of sheets. I was over it!! This weekend was the hardest "mom" weekend for me. Luckily there were some really good times sprinkled in with it but none the less, it was a tough one. I usually get through my days by telling myself, "this day only happens once." Meaning, I can't get it back and if I were to spend my days wishing them away there will undoubtedly come a day when I wish I could have them back. Already my kids are growing very quickly, one of the most important things to me is to appreciate everyday I have with them. Really, we did work ridiculously hard to bring them into this world, I don't want to take them for granted.
This weekend turned a light on for me. Everyone has their limits, but its what I do when you get to that point that matters. I guess the options are to shut down or push through to the next level. I chose to push through, it was not easy but I did it. I'm hoping it will increase my threshold a little bit higher. I am regularly stopped by people simply because I have triplets and they have something to say. Sometimes its a blessing, sometimes its because they are in awe of me and sometimes its negative. I usually don't focus on negative but I am for a moment. When somebody says to me, "Oh, I feel bad for you" or "Oh my gosh three? You must be going crazy?" or "I was pulling my hair out with one and you have three, you poor thing." I usually smile, walk away and call them a mean name in head. This weekend made me think maybe those people shut down more often than they pushed through, that's why they are negative when it comes to the thought of raising children. Part of me feels bad for them, that maybe nobody told them its ok to feel overwhelmed but the key is to not be defined by it. The bottom line is, I can only do what I can and I choose to make the best of every moment and recognize when times are rough it won't last forever.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Thank you
I feel I need to publicly thank certain people and groups of people that have made my journey to run the Boston Marathon possible. With only 10 days left until I run, my emotions are running the full emotional spectrum (no pun intended). One moment I'm nervous, the next I'm excited, then I'm worried, after that there's a bit of disbelief along with everything in between. With that I'm going to start my thank yous.
I must thank my husband, David, for his unwavering support in my quest to run the Boston Marathon. I know being super-dad every Saturday after a long work week is not easy. I appreciate that he sees Saturdays as quality dad-LAL time. He's a great man and I probably don't tell him enough.
Needless to say I owe my parents and my sisters a huge thank you. They've obviously known me from the start and have always supported me in all my endeavors, and there have been quite a few (I'm a jack of all trades). They help me to believe in myself and remind me I can do anything.
My friends, I have great friends!! Jen, Heather, and Randi, these are some of my closest girlfriends and I don't know what I'd do without them. Jen ran the show at my Zumba fundraiser, and when I first got the Tedy's Team application email she was behind me 100%, I wan't sure if I could do it. Heather got me organized when I felt like I was in over my head and reminded I could do it. Randi comes to my house every Monday and Wednesday morning at 7:15 and gets my munchkins ready for the day so I can go on training runs. Amazing!!
Both of my mothers-in-law! They watch LAL at various points during the week to allow me to run and give me some sanity. Thank you, Adele and Paula!!
The Y crew! First, the five instructors that have gotten me in shape to be able to run the marathon. Jodi, my Monday zumba instructor, Ellen, my Tuesdays Sets n Reps instructor, Ellie, my Wednesday yoga instructor, Lynda, my Thursday boot camp a$$ kicker, and last but not least Toni, my Friday Zumba instructor! A special note about Toni, she's AMAZING, she was kind enough to donate her time and resources for the Zumba fundraiser, she's tireless and can move like nobody's business. She's such an inspiration. Next, there are women in each of my classes that keep me coming back, I see them week in and week out and we're striving to be the best us we can be. Their dedication inspires me.
Next, the FitCorp and Tedy's Team crew!! When I took on the challenge of running the marathon AND a $5,000 fundraising minimum, I didn't expect to meet the people I have. Our team director Zack and our coach John, are there no matter what, no matter how ridiculous the question they never judge. My fellow "Boston Three Party" (that's the name we gave ourselves) members, Melissa and Nate. I feel like I've known Melissa forever I couldn't do this without her. I know I have found friends for life in Melissa and Nate.
Last and definitely not least, everyone who has donated in honor of a loved one or support of me. I could not have done this without any of you!! To date, I have raised $10, 944.80!!!! Unreal!!
THANK YOU!!
THANK YOU!!!
THANK YOU!!!!
I love you XOXOX
I must thank my husband, David, for his unwavering support in my quest to run the Boston Marathon. I know being super-dad every Saturday after a long work week is not easy. I appreciate that he sees Saturdays as quality dad-LAL time. He's a great man and I probably don't tell him enough.
Needless to say I owe my parents and my sisters a huge thank you. They've obviously known me from the start and have always supported me in all my endeavors, and there have been quite a few (I'm a jack of all trades). They help me to believe in myself and remind me I can do anything.
My friends, I have great friends!! Jen, Heather, and Randi, these are some of my closest girlfriends and I don't know what I'd do without them. Jen ran the show at my Zumba fundraiser, and when I first got the Tedy's Team application email she was behind me 100%, I wan't sure if I could do it. Heather got me organized when I felt like I was in over my head and reminded I could do it. Randi comes to my house every Monday and Wednesday morning at 7:15 and gets my munchkins ready for the day so I can go on training runs. Amazing!!
Both of my mothers-in-law! They watch LAL at various points during the week to allow me to run and give me some sanity. Thank you, Adele and Paula!!
The Y crew! First, the five instructors that have gotten me in shape to be able to run the marathon. Jodi, my Monday zumba instructor, Ellen, my Tuesdays Sets n Reps instructor, Ellie, my Wednesday yoga instructor, Lynda, my Thursday boot camp a$$ kicker, and last but not least Toni, my Friday Zumba instructor! A special note about Toni, she's AMAZING, she was kind enough to donate her time and resources for the Zumba fundraiser, she's tireless and can move like nobody's business. She's such an inspiration. Next, there are women in each of my classes that keep me coming back, I see them week in and week out and we're striving to be the best us we can be. Their dedication inspires me.
Next, the FitCorp and Tedy's Team crew!! When I took on the challenge of running the marathon AND a $5,000 fundraising minimum, I didn't expect to meet the people I have. Our team director Zack and our coach John, are there no matter what, no matter how ridiculous the question they never judge. My fellow "Boston Three Party" (that's the name we gave ourselves) members, Melissa and Nate. I feel like I've known Melissa forever I couldn't do this without her. I know I have found friends for life in Melissa and Nate.
Last and definitely not least, everyone who has donated in honor of a loved one or support of me. I could not have done this without any of you!! To date, I have raised $10, 944.80!!!! Unreal!!
THANK YOU!!
THANK YOU!!!
THANK YOU!!!!
I love you XOXOX
Thursday, March 29, 2012
The Littlest Big Bang
It all started in March of 2007, I had gotten my period but it was a irregular so I decided to take a pregnancy test and see what happens. Low and behold it said "Positive"!! How exciting?!?! Well not really. When we went for our first ultrasound, we did not get the results we were hoping for. The tech couldn't find a anything in my uterus but did find a mass on my left ovary. Two days later we were sent to Boston to Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center for another ultrasound, the good news is they found the pregnancy! The unfortunate news was that it was in my right Fallopian tube. I was having an ectopic pregnancy that needed to be removed immediately. This was a bit of a whirlwind so I'm going by what I can remember. Obviously, I don't remember the surgery but I do remember, while I was in Pre- Op, the last thing the doctor said to me was, he wanted to be honest and that there was a chance I wouldn't be able to have kids, he might have to remove both of my ovaries. Thanks Doc, that's the best you can come up with 5 minutes before you wheel me in to cut me open?!?! Great! I called my sister Lisa in hysterics. I don't remember what she said but I can only imagine she said something to make it all OK (or as ok as it could be heading into surgery possibly losing both ovaries) as she always does. About four hours after that, I woke in the recovery room feeling very groggy. Thankfully, he only took both Fallopian tubes, half an ovary and a dermoid (if you don't know what a dermoid is, its the kind of cyst whose cells have no identity and have things like teeth and hair that grow in them-gross! I know) cyst the size of a grapefruit! Alas, there was hope, I had a fighting chance at having kids. It wouldn't be easy but there was a chance.
On to, the not so fun part of what's supposed to be the fun part of having babies. After removal of another dermoid cyst (they really aren't supposed to come back after being removed but I'm special) and a ton of tests I was ready for my first IVF (in vitro fertilization) cycle! I was so excited, I just knew it was going to work the first time. How could it not? With everything I had just gone through there was NO way it wouldn't work the first time. It didn't work. I was devastated. How the heck could it not work?!? Did my Dr. not know what he was doing?! Deep down I knew he knew what he was doing because at least four people that I know have become pregnant with him at the helm.
Let me give you a quick overview of an IVF cycle. The office told me when to start my shots. The shots are a mix of hormones to lower some levels and boost others. Sometimes I was mixing meds into a syringe, sometimes I had a spring loaded trigger pen. I had to give myself shots in the stomach every night at the same time until they told me to stop. After a couple of days, I would go to the office for screening- blood work and and internal ultrasound. I would have to go in for screenings every two days, I'd say. They were screening for the growth of my eggs, number of follicles (they would mature into eggs), and sizes of each. Once they got to a certain size and quantity, they would call me and tell me when to take my trigger shot. The trigger shot essentially releases the eggs so they can be fertilized. Once I took my trigger shot David and I would go to the office 36 hours later for an egg retrieval. This is a surgical process where I'm put under and the doctor extracts my eggs and fertilizes them with David's sperm. A couple days later they would call me and tell how many embryos were viable for transfer and when to come back. We would go back to the office for the transfer. This is a quick and easy process, it's completed via catheter placed in the uterus. I think the neat part is that, we were able to watch the transfer on the ultrasound screen. Final step is to wait. Approximately, 12 days later we go in for a blood test, that test gives us either really bad or really good news.
I eventually got over the first one and said "OK, when do I get to start sticking needles in my belly, again?" A couple of months later I started my second cycle. The result: Nada! So that was number two. Holidays came around so we took some time off then we tried cycle three. The result: Zilch. Onto cycle number four...we transferred four embryos. The result: Prego!!!! Yahoo!!! I couldn't believe it! I think I took a thousand pregnancy test just to make sure. I guess there was a reason why I couldn't believe it because it didn't last. Sadly, I miscarried. I was devastated, David was devastated. It was tough. We were heart broken. I thought if maybe I had trusted and didn't take all the EPT tests in New England I wouldn't have miscarried. In reality, I knew there was nothing that I could have done differently but when something I had so wanted was taken away just as quickly as it was given, I was grasping for straws. With that miscarriage, something happened to me a resolve of some sort. I think I must have really given myself to the universe or to God or to whatever the higher power is. I realized, I had no control, it wasn't up to me what happened. I knew I would one day be a mother but understood it was not on my terms. I had absolutely no bearing on when this was going to happen. So that was the fourth cycle, our insurance was only going pay for five cycles. I accepted the fact that this just might not work for me. Maybe we were meant to adopt. Who knows?! I made sure to let the nurses know how much I appreciated all they did for me and their tolerance of me, hormones made me crazy every once in a while ;-) I think the nurses are the true heroes!
With that, I had this clarity of sorts going into my fifth cycle that I had never before had. I knew I would be fine with the outcome no matter what. Then came transfer day of cycle number five-July Fifth, 2009, it was a beautiful summer day. Later that day, we were at my brother-in-law's house for our nephew Duncan's second birthday. We didn't tell anyone where we had been that morning. We learned our lesson, I guess. We didn't want to break anyone's heart again. I remember the moment distinctly, David and I were standing on the front lawn he had his arm around me, there were kids running around, and adults chatting. Then all of a sudden I felt the tiniest flutter in my lower abdomen. I like to call it the littlest big bang, ever. I said to myself, (I didn't even tell David) if it works this time, that flutter was it. Needless to say, that was it! We were pregnant!!! Not with one baby, not with two babies, but with three amazingly beautiful little babies. And that's how it all began!!!
On to, the not so fun part of what's supposed to be the fun part of having babies. After removal of another dermoid cyst (they really aren't supposed to come back after being removed but I'm special) and a ton of tests I was ready for my first IVF (in vitro fertilization) cycle! I was so excited, I just knew it was going to work the first time. How could it not? With everything I had just gone through there was NO way it wouldn't work the first time. It didn't work. I was devastated. How the heck could it not work?!? Did my Dr. not know what he was doing?! Deep down I knew he knew what he was doing because at least four people that I know have become pregnant with him at the helm.
Let me give you a quick overview of an IVF cycle. The office told me when to start my shots. The shots are a mix of hormones to lower some levels and boost others. Sometimes I was mixing meds into a syringe, sometimes I had a spring loaded trigger pen. I had to give myself shots in the stomach every night at the same time until they told me to stop. After a couple of days, I would go to the office for screening- blood work and and internal ultrasound. I would have to go in for screenings every two days, I'd say. They were screening for the growth of my eggs, number of follicles (they would mature into eggs), and sizes of each. Once they got to a certain size and quantity, they would call me and tell me when to take my trigger shot. The trigger shot essentially releases the eggs so they can be fertilized. Once I took my trigger shot David and I would go to the office 36 hours later for an egg retrieval. This is a surgical process where I'm put under and the doctor extracts my eggs and fertilizes them with David's sperm. A couple days later they would call me and tell how many embryos were viable for transfer and when to come back. We would go back to the office for the transfer. This is a quick and easy process, it's completed via catheter placed in the uterus. I think the neat part is that, we were able to watch the transfer on the ultrasound screen. Final step is to wait. Approximately, 12 days later we go in for a blood test, that test gives us either really bad or really good news.
I eventually got over the first one and said "OK, when do I get to start sticking needles in my belly, again?" A couple of months later I started my second cycle. The result: Nada! So that was number two. Holidays came around so we took some time off then we tried cycle three. The result: Zilch. Onto cycle number four...we transferred four embryos. The result: Prego!!!! Yahoo!!! I couldn't believe it! I think I took a thousand pregnancy test just to make sure. I guess there was a reason why I couldn't believe it because it didn't last. Sadly, I miscarried. I was devastated, David was devastated. It was tough. We were heart broken. I thought if maybe I had trusted and didn't take all the EPT tests in New England I wouldn't have miscarried. In reality, I knew there was nothing that I could have done differently but when something I had so wanted was taken away just as quickly as it was given, I was grasping for straws. With that miscarriage, something happened to me a resolve of some sort. I think I must have really given myself to the universe or to God or to whatever the higher power is. I realized, I had no control, it wasn't up to me what happened. I knew I would one day be a mother but understood it was not on my terms. I had absolutely no bearing on when this was going to happen. So that was the fourth cycle, our insurance was only going pay for five cycles. I accepted the fact that this just might not work for me. Maybe we were meant to adopt. Who knows?! I made sure to let the nurses know how much I appreciated all they did for me and their tolerance of me, hormones made me crazy every once in a while ;-) I think the nurses are the true heroes!
With that, I had this clarity of sorts going into my fifth cycle that I had never before had. I knew I would be fine with the outcome no matter what. Then came transfer day of cycle number five-July Fifth, 2009, it was a beautiful summer day. Later that day, we were at my brother-in-law's house for our nephew Duncan's second birthday. We didn't tell anyone where we had been that morning. We learned our lesson, I guess. We didn't want to break anyone's heart again. I remember the moment distinctly, David and I were standing on the front lawn he had his arm around me, there were kids running around, and adults chatting. Then all of a sudden I felt the tiniest flutter in my lower abdomen. I like to call it the littlest big bang, ever. I said to myself, (I didn't even tell David) if it works this time, that flutter was it. Needless to say, that was it! We were pregnant!!! Not with one baby, not with two babies, but with three amazingly beautiful little babies. And that's how it all began!!!
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Here I am
Well, here it goes! My heart is pounding and my palms are sweaty. Would you like to now why?! Because I'm blogging! This is something I've wanted to do since I got pregnant with triplets, but talked myself out of it for numerous reasons. Then all of a sudden, I stared getting signs (I'm a big believer in things happen for a reason and the universe leaves us little nuggets to guide us on our way). Looking back, I guess the first sign was getting pregnant, then carrying my babies to 35 weeks, then giving birth to healthy babies. I'm sure I could list a million more if I tried hard enough but I won't bore you with that. I'll give you the most recent signs that have led me to this moment. First, I was speaking to my Zumba instructor and I mentioned I was getting nervous for race day (I'm training to run the 2012 Boston Marathon) she said, "If you can carry triplets you can run a marathon." And I said "Yeah I guess you're right." Second, a woman in the locker room at the YMCA told me I was an inspiration to her. And most recent, I told a dear friend I wanted to start a blog and they were so totally supportive of me I thought to myself I have to do this.
Here I am!! My name is Kristi, I'm a wife, and I'm a stay at home mom of two year old triplets. Now, I can add blogger to the list!! I don't know what the format of my blog is, I'm assuming it will evolve into its own world. I will talk about a little bit of everything, life, parenting, tricks I've picked up, cooking, working out, marriage and anything else that strikes me. Really ,I just wanted to get my first post off my chest! Now that's done so let the fun begin!!!
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